Holy mother of socks, that is one hell of a thesis you got going there. I gave up trying to communicate to essayists sometime ago, try to condense your responses next time.

It's not for me to tell someone about what only they can possibly know, or discover in themselves. Being honest with oneself tends to be a non transferable skill, either you have it or you don't. Or you finally admit your aren't being honest with yourself, but this will be the result of introspection. We can't actually inform each other's self-generating, organizing, and regulating ecology of mind, we can only trigger what's already there in another. — Anthony

It is not about telling them what to think and how to behave, but to direct them in a manner where they can learn to discover themselves, to help them through the challenges particularly of the anxiety that they may feel, to remind them that they are not alone in the process and that their self-defence mechanisms are irrational. Only they can help themselves and even then, even if you try and support them, a person who is mentally stuck would not be able to understand what you are trying to do, the type of support you are trying to give and would shift it to other thoughts and opinions that enables them to continue thinking incorrectly. If we were aware of all these blockages, it would be much easier to face our faults and improve, but most of us need help.

Laws are the business of the universe, not man — Anthony

Nah, I am pretty sure it is a people thing.

What's important in cleaning up in a person begins way before their behavior, which is the reason why only the individual himself can do it. Perhaps intention is part of it, but even intention is a very limited concept. There are components to the mind and how they communicate with each other anent differences that make a difference, which the individual must get around via transpersonal experiences. Otherwise, the person looks from a part of himself at the whole, which doesn't work. You have to be able to engulf your whole psyche to see clearly the emergent property, or synergy of it. — Anthony

Ok, I think as I attempt to translate the above, that you are attempting to convey this totality in changing and while intent is a source for this motivation, it is not nearly enough to generate the will to change. People then attempt to find possibilities of improvement through external sources like society or people, which is just mirroring behaviour and will not effect any genuine change. If that is what you are saying, then I agree. But this "engulf the whole psyche" is really a physical transformation, to completely change your lifestyle because the biggest problem we have is dealing with or tolerating toxic people in our personal space.

Real change involves time because change cannot be 'sudden' (except for the sudden removal of yourself from the toxic people) and therefore real change - that change within you - is a process over a number of years. One should be adequately prepared to overcome any barriers or obstacles that will prevent that. It is those obstacles that are a challenge; if you want to lose weight, it takes time and effort, but the challenge is that voice in your head telling you to forget it and to eat that damned greasy burger.

I once met a young man that I knew had a part of him that was amazing, but he had so many barriers preventing him from reaching the next stage - he bullshitted to himself like someone I have never seen before - and while I could have helped him overcome those barriers, he was impossible to communicate with. As such, in the end, there is no helping such a person and again by help it is overcoming that barriers to their own improvement, because they wont hear what you are saying or intentionally misinterpret what you are trying to do. You could implode wholeheartedly by shutting down this barriers through a psychotic breakdown, or you could have a good friend that you trust who will support you through those obstacles slowly as you try to understand and find your own voice.

To your example: ...it sounds like the receptionist may have had issues with cognitive load. In which case she should have quit her job or asked for a new position as the correct sacrifice (though obviously she may have had other environmental problems). If it were entirely genetic or from weak internal self-generation, organization and regulation, there is little anyone could have done for her. — Anthony

I went and did research and sometime afterwards, I attempted to discuss it with her but she refused. It was not her job, it was her personal life - her husband and her family - all of whom consistently put her down and degrade her, but even so, it was 'normal' to her and the hysteria that she experienced - despite being a clear indication that something was wrong - she was still in denial even after that. These are the constant obstacles, as I said, we need to overcome in order to face the truth, but for some they are so deep into their problem - she has children for instance - that a complete transformation of their lifestyle is very unlikely, which includes change.