Welcome to the Forum.

ON that specific idea, I would recommend Tao Te Ching. As I'm not a Chinese speaker, I can only read translations, and there are many, so read more than one translation. Then read the Chuang Tzu, translated by Burton Watson. (I would normally recommend books from the Western corpus, but on this particular theme, the Chinese texts are unsurpassed.)

Your post almost sounds like one particular teaching of Buddhism. Maybe you are onto something! :D

Buddha taught that the eight worldly winds revolve around the world, and the world revolves around these eight worldly conditions. These eight worldly winds, or conditions, are: gain and loss; fame and disrepute; praise and blame; and pleasure and pain. And the kicker (that simultaneously confuses and comforts me) is that all these opposites are at the root all the same.

Hey there Jempy. A good start would probably be Aristotle' Eudemian Ethics but you can traverse through all of his works on Ethics and whilst I am a fan of the Tao, it may be a tad bit wishy washy for a newbie.

Regularity of character and the balance between extremes is the only way to establish peace both subjectively and objectively... despite the 2nd law of thermodynamics :-O

The Essays of Montaigne.