Questioning socially accepted ideas and behaviours

deletedmemberal

Almost all of our behaviour, if not all of it, is constricted to certain social expectations (disregarding social and cultural differences), which can often be very specific: one is to dress in such a way or express themselves in a particular manner.
There are those who dare to push for change, raising a new flag. Sometimes, many individuals rally in support of the cause and change is made. Sometimes, the opposite happens. Both cases are true and have been seen many times throughout history, from women attaining the ability to vote to individuals to more progressive ideas and movements.
What all of these successes, or failures, have in common is their grandeur and scale. They are either noble or dishonorable causes, in which only extremes exist. Issues so large that even a hermit may find out about them. Ideas such as women in the workplace become powerhouses of change, questioning profound beliefs and, with time, and success, establishing a new status quo, and with it, a new order of social expectations.
What seems to baffle me is that the thirst for change is not really present on a more personal level. Take for example any conversation, be it among the best of friends or strangers. The topics, the confidence and whatnot may vary, but one thing is to be avoided at all costs: silence. Why must silence be sacrificed on exchange for empty words and dragged out conversations? This leads me to a similar concept: awkward silence. What is awkward about silence? We confront silence incredibly frequently, yet we are ill prepared to be on its ominous presence when on a social setting. It is expected from us to talk or listen, however boring the conversation may be.
The same can be said about being alone on a social situation. One should not go to the cinema alone nor sit down to enjoy some ice cream by oneself. We are alone constantly, but there are situations were is "weird" to be alone. Why is this still present on our lives?

BC

Good topic; good questions.

Why is this still present on our lives? — Alejandro

Because we are social animals and this is the way social animals behave. Why would it be otherwise?

Ideas such as women in the workplace become powerhouses of change — Alejandro

You know, women have been in the work place since ancient times without producing any change at all. Men and women peasants worked in the field together--not because women were liberated, but because it took every able-bodied person to produce enough food and fiber. In the industrial revolution, men, women, and children all worked in factories because their pay -- in exchange for producing tremendous value -- was so low. American slavery was equal opportunity: men and women picked cotton all day in the hot sun. Only during rather brief times of great generalized prosperity have many people -- male and female both -- been able to exempt themselves from the workplace (like during the 1950s and 60s).

In addition to socially acceptable ideas and behavior, there are socially acceptable ideas ABOUT socially acceptable behaviors. I'm 74. My mother did not work outside the home (she had to work pretty hard in the home to care for herself, husband, and 7 children. My father worked full time). Many women in the small town I grew up in did not work outside of the home. I still carry around the idea that it is better for women to take care of children and home, rather than working away from home. This is no longer a viable option for any but either very wealthy or very poor women. My ideas are outdated. Many feminists think it quite backwards to admire homemakers. Again there are acceptable ideas and unacceptable ideas about behavior.

When I was a young man in the 1960s, being homosexual was considered a disease, or severe moral flaw, or at the very least, a damned poor adjustment to reality. Of course I grew up with that idea and had to work very hard to change what I thought about my homosexuality. Eventually I came to view homosexuality as normal, desirable, and perfectly acceptable, and so did a lot of other people. That was what the lavender flag of Gay Liberation was about. Eventually quite a few heterosexuals came to agree that we were OK (at least for the time being).

Questioning socially accepted ideas and behaviours

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