• invicta
    595
    Egos big or small are one of the predominating features of social media stars, celebrities or the trash talking sportsman.

    Why do we have an Ego? I’m talking about the one that sometimes says I’m better than the next guy …does it do more harm then good?

    Self-esteem, self-belief or perhaps confidence seem to rely on positive self affirming feedback that says you can do this.

    If taken further it becomes arrogance with a maligned version of it referred to as narcissism. A fairly common feature amongst celebrities. (Who are repeatedly told be their agent, fans how amazing they are) … and when they have no fans they just tell themselves how amazing they are.

    The problem is if the ego is not properly regulated to reality or actual ability it can either humble someone or simply send them in denial with self deceit or conceit covering any shortcomings.

    A bit of ego is normal even healthy but when it goes to Diva level it’s kinda of ugly really…what makes you think you’re better than me or other human beings? …

    My question is why do so many public figures/celebrities/music stars develop this highly inflated egos (albeit with some level of talent) and why do they public/fans still like worship them?


    They don’t make them like this guy any more…
  • TheMadMan
    221

    The creation of the ego in a person is inevitable.
    It arises out of the dynamics of biology, environment and society.
    Why do we have it? Primarily it wasn't really up to us, just growing up with people ego arises.
    Why do we enforce it and take pride in it? In general it's depended on your culture. The western society gave a strong importance to the individual and his/her success over the world. Especially after the scientific enlightenment.
    In older societies especially non-western, individual pride was looked down upon, so it was not encouraged. People were rewarded more when they acted in the service of their community/tribe.

    The question of the ego can be inquired in different levels but you seem to be asking more about the narcissistic side of the ego.
    I would say that is because of the western culture where there is a worship of the hero and of youth and individual power.
    This need for positive feedback of the ego comes from constant (mainly unconscious) self-doubt and insecurity.

    “Any man who says ‘I am King’ is no true king.”- Tywin Lannister
  • invicta
    595


    Thank you for responding.

    I think there are individuals out there who have been in the depths of despair, a bit of motivational quotes here and there and the think positive thinking and they’re back to their normal self-esteem…some however forget their despair and turn into arrogant fools once more only for the cycle to repeat.

    They say pride comes before the fall and how right it is. I’ve seen UFC fighters who thought they were all that after going undefeated for a time only for it to come crashing down to earth and depression, drug abuse and other such unhealthy things start to occur.

    You might be on top of the world one second but there is no reason why you should devalue your fellow man either through various insults or degrade them in other ways.

    For all that glory, fame and fortune can be snatched from you in a split second.
  • Joshs
    5.2k

    I think there are individuals out there who have been in the depths of despair, a bit of motivational quotes here and there and the think positive thinking and they’re back to their normal self-esteem…some however forget their despair and turn into arrogant fools once more only for the cycle to repeat.invicta

    Here’s how the cycle goes. Only the person who struggles with constant deep-seated doubts about their self-worth evinces to the world behaviors associated with what we call a ‘big ego’. In other words, ‘big ego’= fragile ego.
    Many of us who have to deal with such bullies , narcissists and egotists don’t understand this about them and assume they just enjoy being that way or are in ‘self-denial’. This makes us angry, we let them know we are angry, and this reinforces the egotist’s self-doubts, causing them to need to become even more boastful. Thus the self-reinforcing cycle.
  • Ludwig V
    781
    It might be helpful to think about Rousseau’s distinction between amour de soi (self-love) and amour propre (love of self). The names are awkward, but I think he is on to something.

    Rousseau attributes to all creatures an instinctive drive towards self-preservation. After the theory of evolution, that idea is obviously right. This is what he calls amour de soi; it is the drive to take care of our basic biological needs - food, shelter and warmth. So it seems a pretty good thing.

    Rousseau’s story then gets more complicated. He posits another self-interested drive - amour propre (love of self, often rendered as pride or vanity in English translations), which is concerned with comparative success or failure as a social being. Actually Rousseau thinks that the beginning of this is competition for sex. That would make it pretty much as universal as amour de soi. But it's not just about sex. Amour propre makes a central interest of each human being the need to be recognized by others as having value and to be treated with respect.

    He explains his idea in the context of a speculative history about the development of humanity, which isn’t really credible, and in traditional sexist terms - only males are supposed to develop this. But I think there is a good idea in this even without the trappings that we have to see through because he was, after all, a man of his times.

    Rousseau seems at times to think that amour propre is the root of all evil, but there is an argument that he developed more nuanced ideas later on. However we interpret what he says, the idea is an interesting one and at least tries to reconcile the obvious problems associated with ego with the point that we all have to have a certain level of self-interest in order to survive and function in life.

    See https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/rousseau/ for more details.
  • invicta
    595


    Rousseau, by far my favourite French philosopher (sorry Descartes)

    In interesting distinction drawn there by him in a way a precursor to modern day ideas pervading current psychology.

    Self-love in the pure sense of it and not its aberration or curruption which is the cause of arrogance, hubris and narcissism is in a sense essential to a human beings well being.

    For example being kind and compassionate to yourself is important as well as avoiding doing harm to your body with substance abuse or other forms of self-neglect.

    If we are kind to self it’s only logical for it to follow that we are also kind to others if we are compassionate human beings and not complete psychos who do not extend this kindness to others but only to the self.

    There is more to human psychology in relation to society and sociology.

    Some personality traits may be in fashion like pride, avarice and arrogance and the perpetuation or portrayal of a certain image via media can betray the falsity of it all in the end by their shallowness to ultimately reveal that such individuals have neither the character nor the substance of the high ideals which they wish to embody.
  • invicta
    595
    The masses and the dumb asses who for want of entertainment pay to see their pop star or actor on the big screen must realise that they too are human and ultimately it’s not for the lack of talent or ability that one has to work a 9-5 job and the other walks the red carpet to get their prize. But for luck and circumstance that they’re in such different positions in life.

    Instead the mass of men have self limiting beliefs which says I can’t be as good as Tom Cruise or Ed Sheeran…and perhaps it may even be true at first as I’d rather listen to say Tom Jones then the talentless swine with a sob story on x-factor or the gangsta rap wannabe with 10 subscribers on sound cloud.

    But this only appears so at first for by having that ambition in the first place the wanna be gangsta rapper could turn out to be the next Eminem or Dr Dre with 10million subscribers.

    So the question is not one of talent but of will and determination.

    The negative traits then are pre-existing in each individual and are brought to light in front of a bigger audience if such success follows but as Ali explained in the video in my OP if you are a normal twat or a famous twat you’re still a twat.
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