So I ask myself what's a good ethical metric. For me that's "everyone maximum wellbeing".
Which doesn't mean just happiness. It means potential for education, healthcare, truth and so on. — Jack2848
Not a bad metric.
Whereas a person's gender or sex is essential to one's identity.(Qualitatively). — Jack2848
I argue that gender is social stereotypes about he sexes. I do not believe that social stereotypes are should be essential to anyone's identity.
However. If a person truly believes they are a woman. And the cashier calls them a man even though they dress as a woman and have undergone surgery. Then although it looks irrational from the outside. From the inside it's not unreasonable that they ask to be called the sex or gender they believe to be or how they express. — Jack2848
I agree that it is not unreasonable to ask. It is unreasonable to expect that they oblige such a request. It is not a duty or moral obligation that people agree with your own internal view of yourself when it contrasts with what they observe.
On energy
The energy is easy. It takes less energy to say. Hi woman to someone wearing female clothes and who looks enough like one. — Jack2848
For you. If someone is asking that you refer them as a particular pronoun, then that is because you do not see them as you wish they did. Meaning you do not appear as that particular sex in their eyes, and you are asking them to lie. Its different if you are a particular sex and someone mistakes that. Then you're correcting a person to be aligned with the truth of the situation. If it would be a lie to ask someone to call me doctor when I am not, and that's just a job title, I don't see why its any less of an issue to ask someone to refer to me as the opposite sex that I am. I see gender as sexism and stereotypes, and I am not sexist nor agree to stereotype people.
Lying to people is hard. Asking you to ignore your eyes and ears and call someone something they are not is hard. Especially with those of a moral character who value honesty. It may be easy for you. But it is not for many people. Notice how I recognize it it easy for you. You should recognize and accept those who say it is not easy for them. No, they are not far right. They are not immoral. They are not bigoted. They are uncomfortable lying to people and being told its the right thing to do.
If tomorrow you fully believed that you were a woman. For years you are depressed. You make a vagina where your penis is. You dress like a woman and you take hormones and so on. And you fully belief that your brain or soul or whatever is a woman. — Jack2848
Your brain/soul is not a woman. Your body is. This is the confusion. How you feel about your body does not change its reality. It doesn't matter whether I feel like my face is scarred or not. It is. That is my body. Do you see why I disagree with your view here?
Then given that you would be asking to be called what you are rather than what you aren't when people mistakenly call you what you aren't in your reconstruction of the world. — Jack2848
We are not talking about letting people call you what they think you are. We are talking about people calling you what they know you aren't. If it doesn't matter that they call you something incorrect, there's no need to correct it. If of course someone interacted you in a way assuming you are a particular sex and it was important they be correct in that instance, you should correct them.
People are angry is universal claim. Technically i need only pick one person to prove it wrong. That would be me. But giving the claim some charity. I will take it to assume that most people in the world are angry that if they see a transitioned trans woman that if they meet them they would have to say "she" during conversation if they are near. — Jack2848
You are correct that is is a universal claim that I did not mean to apply as "all people". There are enough people angry about it in the world to be an issue. I won't even claim 'most' as I have no evidence of that. To be clear, they're not angry at being asked and being allowed of their own accord to call them he or she. They are angry at the demand. They are angry at the implication that transition makes you the other sex, and that there is some innate right to cross sex spaces. Anger alone of course is not a justification of that anger, but it is there enough to be a concern.
Additionally most people on the tv networks aren't angry. In fact. Most people that are annoyed , not angry with it. Would for far right. In my country. Yet only about 20% voted for the far right here. So again most people aren't annoyed enough let alone angry that they would vote for them. — Jack2848
I want to be clear I do not view this as a political issue. I have listened to people on the 'the left' also not like that this is an expressed social obligation. This is an intellectual and societal issue. Politics cause us to ignore this aspect and quickly make it a tribal issue. We should avoid that.
I would bet you thousands of euros and we go on the streets to ask people. If you see a transwoman. Would you be angry that there's a social not official expectation that you call them she while they are around? And I would take your money. — Jack2848
You mean i would take YOUR money.
:) I don't think there's anything to debate on here. This is either true, or false, and I don't think either of us have the evidence for it. So lets not focus on people's anger, but the social obligation issue I've mentioned.
I am trying to communicate the idea that we should not be making special demands of society for individuals or pockets of cultures
I would say the opposite. We should help the less fortunate. — Jack2848
In polite culture, you are not obligated to help the less fortunate. No one has to donate to the homeless person on the street. What you should not do, is place undue burdens on the less fortunate. You don't yell or mock a homeless person who smells because they don't have access to a shower. It is nice to help the less fortunate, but it is not an obligation.
From my viewpoint, I do not consider transitioned or trans gender people less fortunate. Everyone has problems, that is theirs. We live in a modern society with good medical care, and they are largely able to get that care. They can still work, own a home, pay taxes, and go into public like everyone else. I owe them no more time or energy then I do any other person walking around. Should I place undue burdens on them because they're trans? Make fun of them, mock them, or any other horrible thing? Absolutely not. THAT is societies obligation. But I have no duty to lie to them, tell them something that isn't true, or treat them in any way differently than anyone else.
To be clear, I had an eye appointment one time and found the person taking it was a trans woman. It was very obvious this was a man, so how did I react? I didn't care. I spoke about the day, asked how things were going, dumb dad jokes, the works. They never asked me to call them a particular pronoun, and I treated them like I would anyone else. That's how a good society works. We all live and work together despite our differences without special treatment.
And if a person has gone through surgery to have a vagina. And they belief they have a soul or some brain composition that is female. Then I think we should take the option that takes less energy, creates more happiness and respect. And say "she" around them. — Jack2848
Absolutely not. A person can do whatever they want to themselves. I am under no obligation to agree with it. Someone can do facial surgery to look like Napoleon and earnestly tell me they are Napoleon. I am only under an obligation not to give them an undue burden over it, not to call or treat them like Napoleon. You are elevating a person's subjective view point as an obligation for other people to agree with. You can call them Napoleon if you think that is not. I am not denying you the right to call a person by their preferred pronouns. That is your choice. But it is a choice, not an obligation. And I am just as free and not morally obliged to agree with a person's subjective view of themself.
So yes they are regering to the cultural expectations they had for a sex. And I can imagine lesbian women getting annoyed. After hearing ''you're not a woman. You're a man''. — Jack2848
Correct. Lesbians and many men do not act in accordance with social stereotypes around their sex. That's the way it should be. No one is obligated to follow subjective social stereotypes. No one is obligated to agree with a person's subjective viewpoint.
It would then be even more horribly unfair. If the same people that would use or create such terms such as tomboy for woman qua sex. Would then claim that it is unfair to define gender mostly in cultural aspects and separate from genitalia. — Jack2848
No, it is unfair that people used gender to tell women they aren't women. And its equally unfair to use gender to tell other people that as a woman, you aren't actually a woman. Gender is prejudice and sexism, and about control. I am advocating freedom from sexism and social control based on subjective non-biological expectations of someone's sex.
I think I followed you well, but please correct me if I did not.