:snicker:

7 hours since your last post. When did the home health care nurse handcuff your hand to the bed rail to prevent you from moving your severed digit?

But clearly, not in Georgia!

All very good questions, so let me fill you in.

I cut the tip, which included some nail and skin. I instinctively applied pressure with the same hand and beat the fuck out of the wall, being sure to hit the tile back splash to avoid needing to take a trip to Home Depot. Having to patch holes after a mishap is something I have grown tired of repeating.

It's like when I threw my weed wacker in the creek. I felt so helpless as it spun through the air.

But I digress.

The bleeding was limited because of the pressure I applied. When they removed the bandage at the ER to look at it, it hurt like a mother fucker. In fact, that's I how I reported the pain. Then it started bleeding. Then I told them to recline the chair because I was going to pass out. Then the heart monitor starting chirping. Then I got an IV. Then I was OK.

They told me to change the bandage 3 times a day, but I'm not touching it. That's for the doctor to do tomorrow. I don't do DIY medical care.

The meat pies are cooking as we speak.

You have tiny hands, man. :chin: — Baden

My wife doesn't complain.

I cut the tip off my left middle finger while cutting up tickets on an extra large paper cutter. The campus doctor was in, so he wrapped it up. It bled and it hurt, of course. The biggest downside was that my efforts to learn guitar came to a screeching halt. By the time the string-pressing finger healed, I had moved on to the kazoo.

Described on the website as “Adjustable Stainless Steel Finger Hand Guard Finger Protector Knife Slice Chop Safe Cooking Tools.”

I don’t want to brag, I’m not saying I’m better than @Hanover, (no matter how justified you might think that would be), I’m not unsympathetic, and I hope his finger regenerates successfully. But…

I’ve been chopping with big sharp knives for decades and I haven’t had any serious cuts. Was the knife, though sharp enough to slice fingers, not quite sharp enough to ensure an effortless action, and thereby dangerous? Did Hanover forget to curl his fingers to protect the tips? Was he distracted by a rowdy goat? What the hell happened?

I’m touching wood right now.

“Touching wood” is British for “knocking on wood,” the common apotropaic magic spell which ensures protection from harm.

I was chopping rosemary, which had hard stems, and I wanted it very fine. The knives were new and very sharp. I've been pushing it probably with my cooking routine and might need to reevaluate my skill level, or, option 2, dress myself in medieval armor and do as I will. Had I been properly outfitted, I could have avoided the injury and taken out the wall with a single lunge.

Next time I will not be bested. May God be my witness. I shall not again fail!

Best meat pie ever though. The crust was baked buttery goodness, the filling a thick stew.

Pie looks great. Another of my prejudices about America has been shattered, namely that a pie for an American is necessarily filled with fruity sweetness.

The filling looks like curry. Maybe the addition of tomato paste produced the orange colour.

Any unusual cuts of meat this time around?

Maybe the addition of tomato paste produced the orange colour. — Jamal

Yes, it did call for tomato paste. No curry though, that British Indian staple.

Another of my prejudices about America has been shattered, namely that a pie for an American is necessarily filled with fruity sweetness. — Jamal

We call them pot pies. There are also pizza pies, but "pie" by itself would mean a dessert usually.

Any unusual cuts of meat this time around? — Noble Dust

Other than fingertips, just beef. It called for lamb, but the lamb selection around here is always limited.

I made the crust from scratch. It was flour and butter with just a small amount of salt and baking powder and only 2 tablespoons of water. It was much more like a pastry than bread. If I added sugar to it, I'd have had a meat stew filled cookie.

Basic life skills...
...that allow you to keep your finger tips.

I like pasties (pron. with diphthongish "a" as in 'past' and not the long 'a' of 'waste' which is what strippers cover their nipples with).

In addition to a pie crust made of flour, lard or vegetable shortening, salt, and water, fill with cubed steak, rutabaga, carrot, potato, and onion, salt, pepper. Add a dusting of flour to the mix. fill 1/2 circle of dough with the filling, fold over and seal. Repeat. Bake. A pastie can serve 1 or 2.

Do avoid adding tomato paste, fresh tomatoes, parsley, sage, rosemary, thyme, curry, and anything else contra Cornish.

I’ve enjoyed several Cornish pasties, but when I went to Cornwall I didn’t go near a pasty. Isn’t that ironic?

In Scotland we have our own pasty, called a bridie.

Whether a pasty is a pie is undecidable.

Other than fingertips, just beef. It called for lamb, but the lamb selection around here is always limited. — Hanover

I figured, or rather fingered, or digited. @Jamal I'm thinking this may explain the vaguely orange color.

Blood in food tends to give it a black or dark maroon colour, so I usually recommend tomato paste when someone asks, “how can I make my food more orangey?”

All these talks about severed finger and meat pies make me feel ill. :vomit:

Hanover shouldn't be cooking while bleeding or growing a finger.

Learn from the tenured shoutbox folk; when you see a gross picture posted by @Hanover you immediately skim and learn how to jump from post to post, all the while avoiding the gross shit, while taking in just enough to add a knowingly dumb comment at just the right time. There's a lot of shit to know in the shoutbox.

Okay, thanks for the heads up. :up: I didn't know there's a shoutbox training.

To be clear, that was all a joke. That's not to say I didn't skip all of the posts about @Hanover's finger because I had a finger injury myself a few months ago and I'm a baby.

I had a finger injury myself a few months ago and I'm a baby. — Noble Dust

:sweat: Sorry to hear that. I hope your finger is okay now.

Thank you; the scar tissue is all but imperceptible.

the scar tissue is all but imperceptible. — Noble Dust

Fingers are the most durable and the most hardworking of all our body parts, I think. (Okay, the heart is the king) They can regenerate when cut up to a certain point. How impressive is that?

They can regenerate when cut up to a certain point — L'éléphant

Where is the point we can cut up to?

RIP Kenzaburo Oē. Japanese writer and Nobel laureate in 1994. Oē has always been one of the Japanese writers that has impacted and moved me the most.

Nobel-winning Japanese novelist Kenzaburo Oe dies at 88

My wall or Hanover's wall? — BC

Do you have holes in your walls? I've always been more prone to breaking things, like throwing a dish on the ground to express my explosive rage. Like Hanover, I eventually discovered that I'm just going to have to clean it up, so don't throw things that explode.

In Scotland we have our own pasty, called a bridie. — Jamal

So, Forfar bridie:


Or Kilie Pie: